Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Completely and utterly _______.

Why the city in the pink of health implemented its “car-less day” policy on a Monday is beyond reason, like Kellie Pickler’s stay in the Top 6 of American Idol (a topic deserving a different article altogether). So the city government blocked the main thoroughfares, leaving both public utility and private vehicles congesting the narrow backstreets. On a Monday!

My usual one-hour travel from home to work turned a quarter longer. After days of buzzer-beating, poor me have spent all the grace periods for the month, and half for next month on top of it. I was left with no choice but to expect a written reprimand and salary deduction come next pay day. =(

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Ba-Be-Bi-Bo-Bu


Wala na ang kopya ko pero kamakailan lang, bumili ako ng bago. Ewan kung saan ko siya gagamitin. Basta nung nakita ko yung dilaw na pabalat at ang mag-inang nakasalampak sa sahig na mukhang enjoy na enjoy sa pagbabasa e naisip kong bumili.
Ito ang unang libro ko. Malamang kayo rin. “Mga Unang Hakbang sa Pagbasa” pala ang pamagat nito. Kilala ko lang kasi ito sa tawag na Abakada. Hindi ko pa rin lubos maisip kung paanong mula sa papantig na pagbabasa (ba-ba, ku-ba, ka-bi-bi, etc.) ay natuto tayong umunawa ng mga aklat na tulad ng The Da Vinci Code at Kama Sutra for Dummies (huh?). Nakakamangha.
Ngayon ko lang din napansin ang ilang nakakatuwa/nakakatawang laman ng aklat: May mapamintas (“Si Aling Nena ay mataba”), may sarcastic (“Naglilinis ka ba ng ngipin?”), merong morbid (“Mahabag ka sa batang binugbog,” “Ang bata ay bumitiw sa kalabaw”). At ang runaway winner, “Ibig kong kumain ng sisiw.”
*****
Pagsasanay. Basahin at gamitin sa pangungusap:
tala sa noo
luha sa mata
suha sa tasa
babae sa babae
binata sa binibini
Hindi ko na maalala kung paano ko sinagot ang pagsasanay. Lalo na yung huling dalawang grupo ng mga salita…
*****
Alam nating lahat na ang Harry Potter ay kay JK Rowling, ang LOTR ay kay JRR Tolkien, at ang Xerex Xaviera ay kay Xerex, pero alam ba natin kung sino ang naghanda nga aklat na angturo sa atin kung paano basahin ang mga nasabing akda? Sabi sa title page, siya si Luningning A. Salvador. Walang "About the Author" ang aklat kaya wala rin akong masabi tungkol sa kanya. Gayunpaman,
taos-pusong pasasalamat ang ipinaaabot ko (saan man siya naroroon) dahil sa kanyang pagsisikap na ipakilala sa atin ang mga "pangunang tunog at pagsasama-sama nito na siyang bumubuo sa mga salita sa Wikang Pilipino.” Amen.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Anderweyt

My latest visit to a physician revealed that I am underweight. I’m actually 2.5 kilos (yes, you read that right) short of my ideal weight. And I’m not bragging. Whoever popularized the idea that being thin is beautiful must be crazy, but those who bought the idea are crazier. Really, what is desirable about being waif-like?
So now the Weight Loss Industry is making a killing in the market. A whole line of products and services were developed to help people become “better people,” as if obesity is a criminal offense. And because those behind the industry wanted to help, they have devised different approaches for different types of people – for the lazy majority, there are miracle pills and fat eliminators; for the health-conscious few, there are diet and exercise systems; and for the rest, there’s Lindsay Lohan.
I’ve never been a weight-watcher. I never count my cups of rice, so why bother with calorie count? Sometimes I devour food good enough for three people, never minding that Gluttony is one of the Deadly Capital Sins. But isn’t it a greater sin to deliberately starve myself and let food go to waste when half of the people on this planet is dying of hunger?
My weight loss went unnoticed for some time, even with the fact that my pants, one by one, screamed for a belt. I thought they were just old and worn, and as my Mom puts it, “lustred.” Loose thread. Whatever. Until I met some old friends who commented on how thin I looked. So for the first time in ages, I actually checked my waistline with a tape measure. True enough, I’m now an emaciated version of the eighteen-year old me. But then, the eighteen-year old me was bloated anyway, so I guess I’m not in a very bad shape at present. I wonder how that happened, when I’ve been cultivating a very sedentary lifestyle and violating every Healthy Eating Tips from the Xenical brochure. (My possession of which is rather anomalous, hehe.)
I quote:
1. Avoid heavy fried food breakfast.
2. Avoid eating meals with big portions.
3. Avoid eating high-fat foods. Skip butter or mayonnaise on sandwiches and toast…
4. Avoid frying foods.
5. Don’t eat junk foods like chocolate bars and chips.
6. Minimize alcohol intake since it is high in calories.
7. Read labels and aim to buy foods with 5 grams of fat or less per serving.
8. Avoid creamy dishes and heavy desserts…
9. If you can’t avoid fast foods, eat simple choices in smaller portions i.e. order a regular burger, share a dessert with someone, eat half a hamburger or order a small-sized French fries.

And there are prescribed “correct food portions to eat” -- pancake about the size of a compact disc, garlic bread about the size of a facial soap, 1 ½ ounces cheese about the size of a 9-volt battery (huh?), etc.

How are we to survive if we follow all that? We’ll all suffer from memory gap I suppose (“Bawal ang pork…”).